yesterday, after skipped the class for several weeks, finally we had time to do the consulting again. hahaa.. this time, since it was a short notice and both of us are in a hurry, so the lesson kinda in pieces. whatever comes to om han's mind, he talked to us and then we will discussed it. wekekeke.. melencengggg..
okay, the first lesson is about having the principal ground in building a family, which is in God. although some family claimed that they're Christian, it don't necesserily grant them happiness. even some non Christian could be happy since they are defining their own happines standard. so if we wanted happiness in our family, we have to put God first and do everything according to His law and surely happiness will follow. perhaps it wouldn't come instantly, but later we will see His plan is never wrong for us.
and being closer to God is important since it also will make us closer to our spouse as well. just like Jeffrey Rahmat said in one of his sermon, like a triangle with God on the peak, if we came closer to God, if our relationship with God grew stronger, it will also draw our spouse closer, as the gap between the base and the apex of the triangle are become closer. and the parents have strong relationship with God, the children will see that example and follow unconciously. and also if there were any problems along the way, as long as we ask God to intervene, there will be a solution.
the next lesson is about changing our spouse. how can we change them? although it seems impossible, it was proven possible in God. the first step that we have to take is to change ourself first. then bring it in prayer so that God may intervene in His way to change our spouse.
and the most important lesson is about how to communicate. communication between two person could be tricky. some obstacles in communication : rock-headed, cocky, unwilling to listen, egoism, and etc. so the most important key in communication is the willingness to listen. the most dangerous thing is if we acted like we listen but in fact, we didn't listen. it could back-stabbed us. and other things that play part in communication besides words are gesture and intonation. same words that was spoken in different intonaton could bring different effects. so i guess, another lesson to lessen the ME inside of me, open our ears as wide as we could, and change first.